You know you are a
1. You believe the AIDS virus is spread by lack of federal
2. You believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th graders
how to read is somehow qualified to teach them about sex.
3. You believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans
are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands
of Chinese communists.
4. You believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
5. You believe that global temperatures are less affected by
cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected
by yuppies driving SUVs.
6. You believe that gender roles are artificial but being
homosexual is natural.
7. You be against capital punishment but support taxpayer
financed abortion on demand.
8. You believe that businesses create depression and governments
9. You believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony
activists who've never been outside of Seattle do.
10. You believe that self-esteem is more important than actually
doing something to earn it.
11. You believe the military, not corrupt politicians, start
12. You believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain
parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because it supports
certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too
14. You believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more
important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E.
Lee, or Thomas Edison.
15. You believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial
quotas and set-asides aren't.
16. You believe Hillary Clinton is really a lady.
17. You believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked
anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in
18. You believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail,
but a liar and sex offender belongs in the White House.
19. You believe that parades displaying drag, transvestites and
bestiality should be constitutionally protected and manger scenes at
Christmas should be illegal.
20. You believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the
Chinese communists is somehow in the best interest of the United States.
21. You believe that this letter is part of a vast right wing